just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Randomize
