I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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