We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize