What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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