It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
