is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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