i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
