I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Randomize
