Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I have post one night stand depression
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