Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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