So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
