Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
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