I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
