It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I smell like Dick and happiness
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
