oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize
