is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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