I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Randomize
