I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
