yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize