I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
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