Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
