I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I think my moral compass just broke
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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