Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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