Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize
