do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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