Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
