so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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