all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I'm passing your future prison.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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