new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I currently don't understand fingers.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
