Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
