There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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