Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Found the puke drawer
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
