Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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