there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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