best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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