Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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