I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
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