Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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