some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
