my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
