i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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