so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
