And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
