Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
