if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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