So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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