we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
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