Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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