Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
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