I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
