sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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