I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
