So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
