when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
